Spun Sunlight


Serena Celia van der Woodsen;
A model, a lover, a genuinely kind person, and a die-hard food appreciator, with a past full of secrets, and a future full of promise.

I will be independent. I will be my own woman. I will be true to myself. I will be a respectable, strong person.

















| ← Notes

A Subtle Ambush || Serena & Blair

Serena van der Woodsen was never really fond of work. She hated long hours of being tied to some arduous task that she didn’t actually care about, she hated having to worry just because other people told her she should, she hated spending gratuitous amounts of time thinking about things that required very little effort from others and loads from her, and most of all, she hated the feeling of being trapped.
So, why is it, you ask, is she currently working for a top tier modeling agency as, essentially, the face of their entire company? It’s simple. She was bored.
It’s very easy for someone like Serena to grow bored with things. After all, she had just spent ages traveling around the world, doing whatever the hell she pleased, when she pleased. Drifting from one task to another, on one continent or another, was exactly the sort of thing that would appeal to her. Eventually, though, the jet-lag morphs into exhaustion which morphs into sorrow which makes one realize just how much they miss their home, their friends, their family. And damn, had Serena missed her’s.
Anyways, she had returned to New York, fully expecting to be welcomed with open arms. It was a strange and heady thing, seeing with your own eyes how life just continues on in full swing while you’re gone…like it didn’t even matter if you were here or not. Serena had asked herself many times why she had initially expected everyone’s lives to just be on pause for the time she was out of them, but she had never come up with a logical answer that didn’t involve extreme narcissism.
Still, you can imagine her bewilderment when she came home to find that, indeed, everyone had moved on to what seemed to be greener pastures. Chuck was great, prospering with Bass Industries like Serena always knew he could. Blair had shaved a few more years off of her plan, and seemed to be getting along swimmingly with Serena’s ex slash ill begotten step-brother, Dan. Jenny…well, Serena didn’t really talk to Jenny all that much, but that had begun way before she had left Manhattan. Her biggest surprise, though, would have to be Nate.
To say that she had played the fool would be a vast understatement. She was pretty sure the whole of the Upper East Side knew by now what had conspired that night when she had shown up, unannounced to his apartment, fully expecting to be welcomed in like the old friend that she was. She had knocked twice upon reaching his door, and after about thirty seconds of waiting—Serena had never been patient—she had promptly informed Nate that she was coming in. Upon entering, nothing had seemed out of the ordinary. A few callings of his name resulted in loud cursing from his bedroom, and Serena, of course, had been unable to decipher straight away why that was. She was rewarded for her natural naivety by an embarrassing display of hastily pulled-up sheets, red faces, and stumbled-through apologies before she quickly excused herself from his apartment and his life in general. She hadn’t spoken to Nate since, if that could even have been deemed speaking.
Not much else eventful had transpired since her long-overdue return. She didn’t see much of Blair, even with her living in the Waldorf mansion with her. The brunette was just so damn busy all of the time, that it was hard to work between both of their schedules and find a chance to just…talk, and have girl time. Serena was sorely in need of it, and she missed her best friend dearly. She missed how they used to stay up at night, gushing to each other about every tiny detail in their lives. She missed that openness that they had before she left; that feeling that she could say anything, do anything, and Blair would never leave her. Never fail her. Serena wanted to reconnect with that. To reconnect with the only person that had always been there for her, even when others came and went. And by God, she was going to.
It was about seven o’clock Saturday morning when Serena approached Blair’s door. Normally, the blonde was the one to sleep in, and Blair was the one to be up and gone out the door before the clock struck eight. That’s why Serena had gotten up extra early today—or at least as extra early as she had been capable of without becoming a zombie—to catch Blair before she left. She was bound and determined to talk to her friend, find out what was going on with her, maybe see if they could spend some time together when she wasn’t busy. Personally, Serena had the entire day off, but you never knew with Blair. She always had somewhere to be, some plot that needed a little extra scheming, maybe another student at Columbia to humiliate and make herself look better with. Whatever it was today, Serena was full-on prepared to attempt to convince Blair out of it. Or beg, if necessary.
“Good morning, sunshine.” Serena sang as she let herself into Blair’s room, surprised to see the normally early-bird still under the covers, with that signature eye-mask attached to her features. Moving that direction, Serena promptly flopped down on Blair’s bed beside her, using her weight to try to jostle the other girl into consciousness. Perhaps not the best approach, but it was Serena we were talking about.


Sunsets And Shooting Stars
I remember at one point in my life when I would have been loathe to be anything like my mother. I remember when waking up in the morning and having to think about where I am, having to figure out when the last time I spoke to my friends, my family, was terrifying to me. Now I've been there, I've done that, and I realize that it was inevitable. I was always meant to be just like her. Of course, just because I realized that, doesn't mean I've accepted it. I'm still going to try my damnedest to be someone worth knowing. To be someone who is there for the people she loves when they need her. To be someone that I can respect as well as everyone else. To be someone worthy.